Home Away from Home

Thanksgiving break rolls around and the streets of IV are empty. For most college students, this is the time to go home and be with family. However, for those studying further away from home, a four-day break is not enough time to catch two flights and see the people they love. For this November issue of Fig and Vine, I’ve decided to interview two study abroad students and one exchange student, asking how they’ve found friends that have become like family in various parts of the globe. 

The first student I spoke with was Kylee Sciara, a 3rd year Film & Media and Communications double major studying in Barcelona. We chatted about some weekend travels, Shabbats at Chabad, and the value of saying yes to new things. I asked what’s been most meaningful about her experience, and she replied, 

“I think one thing that is very meaningful is the energy that everyone has when you’re studying abroad. All of the other study abroad students have such a desire to see the world. You can tell that everyone studying abroad has such an open mind to do new things. I think learning about new cultures is so meaningful and important. It’s so special that I get to experience so many different cultures when I’m traveling around because I would never come into contact with this in America.” 

I then asked about the different cultural experiences she’s had abroad. She filled me in on some of her adventures. 

“When I was in Copenhagen, Denmark, I was trying to do something within the culture. So there we went to a sauna, which is really big culturally there, to do a cold plunge and go in the sauna. That was really cool and fun, it was like a little spa day. Then I went to Morocco, and that was probably the most different culture. It’s very different from the Western world. So seeing the culture that they had there was cool. I also went to Albania, and that was beautiful. Beautiful views and palaces and mountains and trees everywhere! Albania was my favorite trip for sure.” 

Although Kylee spent most of her weekends exploring a new country, she has also spent a handful of her Friday nights in Barcelona, where she seeked to celebrate Shabbat with her newfound community. 

“When I go to Chabad, it’s always a really positive experience. I always gravitate towards the few other college students that are there. They’re usually also from different countries or regions of Spain, so it’s really cool to hear about how they practice Judaism in other areas. Having a safe space amidst all the chaos here is really cool.”

On the topic of being with community, I also asked Kylee if she had any Thanksgiving plans despite not being in the U.S. this year. 

“Some of my friends have their parents coming here for Thanksgiving. My family is unfortunately not. But we are doing a friendsgiving on Tuesday. The UC Education Abroad Program is also hosting a Thanksgiving dinner for us. So we all get to dress up and go to a fancy venue. There is supposed to be a traditional Thanksgiving dinner there. So that’s how my roommates and I are celebrating Thanksgiving this year.”

I concluded my conversion with Kylee by asking if there’s anything she learned during her travels that she’d like to take back to California. 

“I hope I will bring the willingness to say yes and do things that kinda sound silly at first. Like when my friends said they wanted to go to Albania, I was like, ‘Albania, what? That’s such a random country, why would we go there?’ But it actually ended up being my favorite trip. Or, I really tried to max out every day. So even if it was a chill day in Barcelona, I would try to travel to a new area or be active to make sure I wasn’t wasting a day. So I hope I take with me the practice of never wasting a day and always trying to do new things.” 

The next student I spoke to about the quarter abroad was Nadiv Meltzer, a 4th year Psychology major studying in Madrid. We discussed the importance of friendships overseas, old and new. We also talked about how travel can reveal the world to be a kinder place than what we see on social media and the news. 

I asked Nadiv to tell me about his experiences meeting people abroad. 

“Making friends within my university has been incredibly meaningful to me. Those kinds of cross-cultural connections, mostly with European people either studying abroad for a semester or spending four years at the university. Getting to learn about their life experiences, what led them to where they are, and also, getting to learn about and understand those various cultures has been really cool and a very meaningful experience.” 

I asked Nadiv to elaborate on making these new connections, especially as a Jewish student from the United States. 

“Not only is one of the benefits of being a diasporic people is that we get to find people who we can feel so comfortable with in so many different parts of the world. But actually, the world at large is not as scary of a place as many people think. To experience that abroad, through my travels and through living in Spain, is something very cool and special. I’m making those connections with non-Jewish people as well. It’s nice to have friends in lots of places.” 

However, when it comes to Jewish life in Madrid, Nadiv is also able to turn to a familiar comfort.

“I’ve been lucky enough to have some really good Jewish friends here in Madrid as well. So really, thanks to that, I’ve had the opportunity to go to them for the high holidays. I’ve also had the opportunity to experience a couple Shabbats and get togethers. I’d say the main organization that did that is Olami, and also the conservative synagogue in Madrid has been very available and supportive.”

For more context, Olami is a center for Jewish students and young adult professionals living in Madrid. They host Shabbats as well as educational and networking events. 

I was also curious about Nadiv’s travels across Europe. He filled me in on two of his most memorable weekend excursions. 

“My older sister is currently a member of the Peace Corps and she’s in the country North Macedonia fulfilling her duties. This weekend I traveled and visited her. It was so incredibly fun to see her life and how she’s living. It’s a significantly different lifestyle to anything I’m used to. Few of the people I’ve met in any of the places I’ve traveled to are very similar to that place and that way of living. It was incredibly eye-opening. Also, my sister and I are very close, so it was just really great to spend that time with her.” 

“Another trip that was incredibly incredibly fun was when a bunch of friends from Santa Barbara came to visit. I’m living with a good buddy of mine here in Madrid, Amit, so they all came and visited us. Over that weekend, we rented a car and drove down to the south of Spain. We did a whole southeastern tour, on the coast, on the beach. We met a whole bunch of people. We saw three major cities in the south of Spain. Just road tripping through a foreign country with some of my best friends was a very cool experience.”

Finally, I asked Nadiv about his Thanksgiving plans in Spain. 

“Like I alluded to previously, I have a really good group of American friends who also are in Madrid at the same time as me. So we are going to get together, have a potluck dinner, and probably try to recreate some of those classic American Thanksgiving foods to the best of our ability. We will do all of the traditional Thanksgiving activities like going around the table and saying what we’re thankful for. Yeah, I think Thanksgiving, even though it’s mainly celebrated in the United States, is not really a geographically restricted holiday. It’s just about being with family. So I’m lucky I’m with such close friends that they’re like my family. I’ll still get to have a really meaningful Thanksgiving experience and I’m really excited about that.”

As I wrapped up my conversation with Nadiv, he emphasized how beneficial, eye-opening, and fun study abroad has been. 

“I feel so incredibly lucky. I cannot recommend it more highly to anybody who thinks that they might be interested. I’d say do it do it do it, 100% do it.” 

The last student that I had the pleasure of chatting with was Adina Frankental, a 1st year exchange student from Sweden. She is studying in the U.S. to receive the Creative Writing Certificate from SBCC. My first question was what drew her to this program. 

“In Sweden, we have different programs in our high schools. So I went to a technology program. It was very much physics, very much math, and in my first year I realized I don’t like this. I’m going to do a business and economics degree in university, but I felt before that, I needed to do something creative. I have always liked writing, reading, and creating stories. I really wanted to take a gap year and explore those interests more. I also love traveling so much. So I thought I could somehow combine traveling and writing, and I thought it would be fun to take some classes. SBCC had this creative writing certificate. I have never been to the U.S. before, or this side of the Earth before, so I thought it would be a fun opportunity to study and improve my English.”

I also asked Adina about her first impressions of California. 

“I feel that in Sweden, everyone is very introverted. Here, everyone is so social and outgoing and more expressive. I really like that sort of environment. So I’ve had a very positive impression of California.”

She then told me about her travels to San Francisco, San Diego, and Yosemite. 

“[Yosemite] was like a religious experience. Just the scale of everything. It was so wow, so beautiful. I felt like a little kid because the trees and the mountains were so huge. It also reminded me of home because I live in the forest. I took so many pictures. I probably took half the storage space in my phone with just these pictures.” 

Adina and I could very much relate over our shared love for nature, and continued to chat about Yosemite and other national parks. She also told me about a hiking class she’s taking at SBCC, which has taken her to local spots like Montecito Hot Springs, Cold Springs, and Rattlesnake Canyon. 

I asked Adina to recall one of her favorite memories from this semester. She delved into a very sweet story. 

“We had international students week one week before classes started. We met a bunch of different students from all over the world. I randomly decided with my roommates to go to the city with some girls to hang out and get to know each other a bit better. It turned out that one of them, who is a Japanese girl, was going to become 20 the day after. We were like ‘what are your plans’ and she was like ‘oh I don’t have any plans, I don’t know anyone or anything.’ So we were like ‘but you’re 20, you have to do something.’ So we made a surprise birthday party. We got a cake for her, and some snacks, and we took out blankets to the beach and listened to music. We had her birthday on the beach with the sunset. It was so special, we just danced around on the sand while it got dark outside. It was a very nice moment with these people I only met the day before.” 

I also wanted to hear about Adina’s involvement with Jewish life in Santa Barbara, and what has been similar and different to her Jewish experiences back home. 

“In Sweden, I grew up in a really small town. I was the only Jewish family in my small town. So I never had Jewish friends growing up besides my cousins in some bigger cities. So I really wanted to explore that part of my life more. Since I knew Hillel was an organization, I reached out and they responded. I got in touch with a representative with Hillel and I went to some events as well. I think the first time I went to Hillel was Rosh HaShanah, and it was a great experience for me. In Sweden, the closest synagogue is in a bigger city a couple of hours away. So I haven’t been to a synagogue that often. But when I have, it’s always been very different. Here, you sing songs in English as well. That’s so cool to me because I’ve only sung them in Hebrew and I don’t speak Hebrew. It was just a very nice moment where I felt very connected to everyone.” 

On the topic of new traditions of connection, I asked Adina if she would be celebrating Thanksgiving while in the U.S. 

“Actually, the Japanese friend I was telling you about lives with a host family. They’ve invited my roommate and I to their place to have Thanksgiving dinner there, an American Thanksgiving dinner. Thanksgiving is not really a thing in Sweden at all. My mother actually grew up in Thailand and went to international school there. There were a lot of American people there, so she always makes turkey on Thanksgiving for us. But we don’t really celebrate Thanksgiving besides that. So yeah, I’m really excited for this year.” 

My final question for Adina was if there was anything she’d experienced or learned that she’d like to bring back home with her. 

“I feel like I got to know myself much better by coming here. I came here with a friend from my high school. We’re roommates together, and I feel like we’ve become better friends than before. So that’s something I’m bringing home to me. Also, I used to be very scared about approaching people and talking to people, and going to events alone. But that fear has completely vanished for me. I’ll say ‘oh, that sounds fun, I’ll just go there’ and if I don’t have anyone to go with me, that’s fine too. I’ve just become more comfortable in myself. If I can move across the Atlantic directly after finishing high school, it’s not that bad to talk to a new person.” 

Adina concluded our conversation with a very similar sentiment to Nadiv’s perspective on study abroad. 

“To anybody who is thinking about going abroad and getting that experience, I think that you definitely should. I’ve learned so much coming here. I got to see a new culture, see new places and people. When you go on a vacation somewhere, you only know that place on a surface level. But when you study abroad you have so much more time to fall in love with the place and actually meet people who can bring you into that culture.” 

While it’s never seamlessly easy to embrace unfamiliar spaces, this is a prime time of our lives to say yes to new opportunities. Kylee, Nadiv, and Adina can all attest to encountering incredible sites and people, learning more about themselves, and making deep connections while studying abroad. Not only did they have such positive stories to tell, but they also got to take part in Jewish community no matter where they were, as well as spend Thanksgiving with people they’ve become close with in a short amount of time. According to these three students, international study results in the best of memories, plus friendships from all across the globe that can stand a lifetime. 

Whether at home or abroad, with friends or with family, Fig and Vine wishes you a cozy and meaningful holiday season.